“Unlocking Life’s True Meaning: Embrace the Journey Beyond Plans” ~Lao Tzu
Around a year ago, I stumbled upon an online course titled “Discover Your Purpose in 15 Minutes.” It happened during a phase when I was actively seeking a sense of purpose. For the very first time, I found myself uncertain about my next steps, with nothing specific to pursue. It was as though I needed a fresh spark to propel me forward.
This e-course, representing a world increasingly consumed by the pursuit of destiny, only added to the pressure. Especially from the self-help community, there’s an incessant drive to lead a purposeful life. However, when my own destiny remained elusive, let alone attainable, waves of failure engulfed me.
Now, I can’t assure you that you’ll uncover your life’s purpose in a mere 15 minutes, as I never took the course. Yet, what I can assure you is this: finding meaning in a life without a defined purpose is absolutely attainable.
The Allure of Purpose
Purpose seems like a solution to the question, “Why am I here?” It offers a compass, steering us through life’s course. Some might unearth purpose in meaningful work, channeling their skills to serve the world’s needs. Others find purpose in nurturing a family, tending to loved ones, or actively engaging with their community.
Purpose endows us with a sense of doing what we’re meant to, living out our life’s mission, and contributing positively. Amid a world where most fundamental human needs are met, it’s unsurprising that we seek deeper fulfillment. When survival ceases to be a struggle, it’s only natural to pause and ponder the purpose behind it all.
The Predicament with Purpose
Living a life driven by purpose sounds appealing, and I’m not here to belittle anyone’s purpose-driven journey. Instead, I wish to remind those who haven’t found their purpose that life can indeed be rich and fulfilling without it.
The problem with purpose isn’t the purpose itself; it’s our unyielding fixation on finding it. The pursuit of work we adore, making a meaningful impact, and leaving a legacy has become so coveted that existential worries often cloud conversations with peers.
For instance, many of my friends appear restless when unsure of their next steps or uncertain if their current pursuits align with their true calling. I’ve also wrestled with discomfort stemming from not making grand contributions to the world.
Collectively, it seems we’re convinced that without a monumental goal, we’re somehow falling short in life. Yet, this notion blinds us to the opportunity of crafting a life rich in meaning, sans the confines of a predefined purpose.
An Alternative to Purpose
Here’s where I propose an alternative—not to purpose itself, but to the glorification of purpose and the fervent chase for that singular element promising meaning and contentment.
Certainly, living a life with significance is crucial. The absence of direction on this planet can breed restlessness at best and nihilism at worst. However, instead of anchoring ourselves to the pursuit of purpose, I advocate anchoring to values.
Personal values act as compasses guiding us on life’s journey, even if the destination remains uncertain. More crucially, values are far easier to uncover than some grand purpose.
Think about those you admire. What values do they epitomize? Courage, empathy, ambition? Our admiration isn’t typically for their achievements but rather their character, which paved their path to success. What character traits do you wish to nurture within yourself?
Personal values allow you to live aligned with what matters most—be it serving others, embracing courage, or assuming full responsibility for your life. Unlike a singular purpose, values infuse meaning into every moment, transcending the confines of a solitary noble cause.
For instance, if kindness is your value, it can metamorphose mundane tasks into acts of kindness. An uninspiring job can morph into a playground to practice kindness. And even that irksome family member becomes an opportunity for compassion and consideration.
My Odyssey with Purposelessness
Once, I navigated life fueled by urgency, relentlessly advancing in pursuit of my life’s mission. Goal upon goal was set, driven by the belief that meaning would flood in once achieved.
Yet, despite conquering life’s typical milestones, the elusiveness of meaning persisted. Fresh goals were set, convinced that the next achievement would unveil the missing piece.
Amid a major crossroads last year, I diverted my focus from seeking purpose to infusing meaning into everyday existence. A year has passed, and I’m still unsure of my destined path. However, I’ve grown content with embracing the unknown—living comfortably in purposelessness.
In the interim, I discover meaning by nurturing my character through lived values. At this juncture, courage, tenderness, and depth are my pillars. I employ daily trials to embody these values.
Tenderness, for instance, encourages me to stay open amid adversity. By showing compassion towards those who challenge me, I reinforce this facet of my character. Self-compassion allows vulnerability when strength isn’t the compassionate response.
Courage isn’t merely about facing fear but also listening to my heart and voicing my truths. While nurturing courage ushered me into nerve-wracking situations—like quitting a unfulfilling job—it equipped me to carve a life authentic to my identity.
Lastly, depth is cultivated by eschewing mere social media scrolling, immersing myself in captivating books, or revisiting cherished places. Delving into a familiar city’s nuances offers a richer travel experience than fleeting getaways.
Cultivating these values ushers growth and character development within each moment. As I discern the “why” behind my existence, values serve as my steadfast “how.” Unlike a singular purpose, I freely explore and experiment with my array of values.
Perhaps one day, my purpose will cross my path. Or, as age creeps in, I might realize that my purpose was woven through my life all along. For now, I’m eager to embrace life’s unfolding journey—finding meaning by anchoring myself in values.
Feeling adrift in life? Embrace it. Acknowledge that quick fixes aren’t feasible within 15 minutes. Simply show up daily, open your mind, and immerse your soul in the realm of possibilities. Your journey will brim with meaning and wonder—even without the elusive concept of purpose.