Kris Carr once said, ‘Sometimes doing less is more than enough.’ Two years ago, I made a life-altering change. Prior to this transformation, I was perpetually chasing after more: more achievements, more tasks, more responsibilities. I filled every waking moment with a never-ending to-do list, balancing my business, work, studies, and the pursuit of pleasure. It was overwhelming, and I was losing myself in the process.
Building a business turned out to be far more demanding than I had envisioned. To make ends meet, I juggled multiple part-time jobs and sometimes even worked full-time alongside my business endeavors. My pursuit of knowledge led to a decade of non-stop studying, amassing numerous certificates, diplomas, and even a master’s degree.
Incessant comparisons with others left me feeling inadequate and perpetually dissatisfied with my own accomplishments. I toiled relentlessly to do more, achieve more, and be more.
Taking time to relax or enjoy myself felt like a guilty pleasure. Downtime seemed like laziness, and any quiet moment only highlighted the exhaustion from my workaholic lifestyle.
Friends often marveled at my productivity, saying, ‘I don’t know how you do it all.’ Truthfully, I didn’t know either. All I knew was that I was utterly drained, unhappy, and growing distant from the people I cherished.
My life needed a drastic change. I couldn’t sustain this fatigue, and I yearned for more joy and deeper connections with loved ones. That’s when I realized I had to do less.
Before I could start shedding commitments, I had to identify what truly mattered to me. I asked myself pivotal questions:
- What do I truly love doing?
- What energizes me?
- What brings me unbridled joy?
- What do I genuinely desire?
- What is absolutely essential?
While an ideal world would allow us to indulge only in our passions, reality obliges us to handle tasks we may not relish. Some can be delegated, but others are non-negotiable.
Once I pinpointed what truly mattered—spending quality time with loved ones, using my business to support and educate others, and engaging in activities nurturing my physical and mental well-being—I began to let go.
It wasn’t easy. Embracing the void in my schedule felt peculiar, and I battled the urge to fill it with an ever-expanding to-do list.
To support my new approach, I established boundaries:
- No work after a specific daily cutoff time.
- Weekends were sacred, work-free zones.
- I refrained from checking emails or messages in the evenings.
- Mornings became screen-free until after breakfast.
- On vacation, work was off-limits, and screen time was limited.
Setting these boundaries required me to get comfortable with saying no. I declined social situations that drained my energy, turned away from business ventures misaligned with my vision, abandoned further studies as my qualifications already sufficed, and rejected tasks I genuinely didn’t want to undertake.
Saying no wasn’t simple. It’s easier for me to say yes, as I dislike disappointing people and missing opportunities. However, it was time to focus solely on the essential and what would make the most significant impact on my life and business. I couldn’t do it all.
I reminded myself that saying no wasn’t an outright rejection; it was my way of prioritizing, of saying yes to what I genuinely desired, and making room for what mattered most.
I also transformed my mindset regarding comparisons with others. Instead of feeling inferior due to their accomplishments, I began to view their successes as inspirations and reminders of what’s attainable.
I realized that we only witness the highlights of others’ lives, work, and achievements, a skewed and incomplete picture. We don’t see the sweat, tears, and failures behind their triumphs. Regardless of success, everyone encounters ups and downs.
To my astonishment, I learned that successful individuals don’t say yes to everything; they’re discerning and selectively choose what enhances them. They excel at delegation. This revelation shifted my perspective on attempting to do it all.
By doing less, I discovered more time, energy, and enthusiasm for what mattered most to me. I felt invigorated and joyful. My work quality improved, and I became more present in life and with people, greatly enriching my relationships.
Occasionally, I still grapple with the urge to do more. Yet, the happiness and fulfillment I’ve found in doing less eclipse those moments. I can’t return to the unhappiness and exhaustion of ceaseless striving.
Now, before I add anything to my calendar or agree to tasks, I ask myself these guiding questions:
- How important is this to me?
- Will this energize or deplete me?
- Is this an absolute necessity?
Doing less doesn’t equate to doing nothing. It means dedicating more time to what truly matters, resulting in a happier, more fulfilling life.
