“Don’t take life too seriously. You’ll never get out alive.” ~Elbert Hubbard
For years, I confined my identity within the boundaries of my career—an assumption that soon revealed itself as my first mistake.
Over the past six years, I toiled at a bustling publicity firm in the heart of Los Angeles. A realm where the morning ritual was opening emails before stepping out of bed, where meals coincided with phone conversations, and where even funerals were no sanctuary from work’s demands. It entailed frequent travel, evening commitments, and scarcely any room for leisure, let alone free time.
Regrettably, this job turned into my existence—a relentless cycle between work, home, and bed each day.
Seven months ago, I pressed pause. Not only did I bid farewell to my job, but I embarked on a one-way journey to Puerto Rico, leaving behind my Los Angeles life.
Meeting someone altered my outlook, revealing the notion that I ought to seek a life suffused with happiness. This revelation led me to confront the fact that my job had failed to deliver the life I yearned for. My health deteriorated under the weight of stress, my migraines became a weekly ordeal, and even my doctor prescribed a change.
Those initial weeks on Puerto Rican shores painted a paradise. Lounging on sandy beaches, embracing the art of diving, and conquering a surfboard became my reality. I reveled in waterfalls, savored pina coladas, and love bloomed. However, the elation began to ebb, and anxiety loomed in its place.
The epiphany arrived: when I relinquished my job, I unwittingly stripped away 90% of what I considered life. I now faced an unsettling void. Hobbies, interests, even my identity, all lay dormant, obscured by years of being consumed by work. The relentless pursuit of busyness left no room for self-discovery.
The void stirred a flurry of thoughts, and pondering spiraled into over-analysis, cascading into anxiety. With each morning, I wrestled a knot in my stomach. What was I doing? Could today be a happy one? What was my next career step? How would life unfold in Puerto Rico?
Worries extended to my newfound relationship, a union founded on my drive, independence, and passion—characteristics exhibited through my former job. Now, stripped of that role, I feared losing those traits and his affection.
Slowly, clarity surfaced—I wasn’t defined by my career. It wasn’t the essence of who I was. Those qualities remained intact, undiminished by the change in my circumstances. Unnecessary thoughts were festering in my mind, propagating worries that didn’t deserve occupancy.
People often dream of an idyllic life on a tropical haven, where the ocean greets you each dawn, where solitary walks grace empty shores. So, why, amidst paradise’s splendor, was I entangling myself in worry and stress?
If I couldn’t vanquish these anxieties in this paradise, what chance did I have anywhere else?
Thus, my mission unfurled: relinquish the grip of seriousness, and cultivate presence to unearth happiness within myself and my new life. I embraced these daily mantras:
1. Give yourself some credit. Commend yourself for taking leaps—quitting a job, relocating to an island. Amid self-doubt, acknowledge the triumphs: grappling with Spanish, conquering the waves, embracing local fitness classes, forging new connections. The good remains obscured if you focus solely on the negative.
Ease up on self-criticism. Dedicate ten minutes to meditation and congratulate yourself afterward. Begin your day with a wholesome breakfast. Strike up a conversation in a coffee shop queue. Acknowledge the little self-care moments threaded throughout your day.
2. Stop thinking so much. Devote two minutes to absolute mental quiet. Cast aside concerns about the uncertain future—it’s fruitless worry that squanders your energy.
In moments of mental chaos, pause, breathe deeply thrice, replace negativity with a positive thought, and watch a smile form. A reason to smile consistently prevails, eclipsing the reasons to fret.
3. It’s okay to take a break. When family questioned my choices—why squander a college degree, expend a 401k on an island escapade—I responded by acknowledging the monumental effort poured into six years of demanding labor. It’s alright to pause, to forgo constant achievement. Not every day needs to yield groundbreaking discoveries; occasionally, just being present is enough to experience life.
4. You don’t have to find your life purpose tomorrow. The phrase “find what you love and do it” once vexed me, seeming deceptively simple. However, each day offers room for novelty. My time in Puerto Rico uncovered newfound loves—appreciating oysters, reveling in aquatic splendor, and unveiling untapped creativity. While I’ve yet to unearth my life’s calling, the quest itself presents opportunities for self-discovery.
In summary, life’s wisdom beckons: Don’t clutch life too tightly; its ephemeral nature ensures none of us leave alive. By nurturing presence, shedding unwarranted seriousness, and kindling curiosity, I’ve unlocked the doors to a more fulfilling existence. And you, too, can journey toward such liberation.