“Good habits are worth being fanatical about.” – John Irving
Your habits wield incredible influence over the quality of your life. The embrace of positive habits nurtures joy and contentment, while less-than-ideal habits leave you longing for a more fulfilling existence. Reflecting on this truth, I find myself wishing I had truly embraced it earlier. Nevertheless, there’s wisdom in the adage that it’s better to start late than not at all.
Gretchen Rubin, the insightful author of “Better Than Before: What I Learned About Making and Breaking Habits,” brilliantly captures the essence of habits: “Habits are the invisible architecture of our daily life.” A significant portion—approximately 40%—of our behaviors repeat themselves nearly daily, shaping our present and future. Indeed, altering our habits can be the catalyst for profound life changes.
In my own journey, I’ve often languished in anxieties and regrets, questioning the hardship of life. Hoping for external saviors to rescue me, I discovered that true transformation stemmed from within. However, the path was far from immediate.
There were times when my aspirations seemed grand, and my plans appeared foolproof. But often, these grand intentions fizzled out quickly, failing to yield the happiness I yearned for. It was puzzling; the elements I thought would bring me peace proved to be lacking. That’s when I learned that sometimes, it isn’t about radical changes but rather subtle, consistent adjustments that make the difference.
The maritime adage illustrates this beautifully: while large sails are needed to move a great ship, it’s a slight rudder adjustment that shifts its course. However, the rudder adjustment is meaningless if the ship remains stationary. In essence, your daily habits serve as those small rudders, propelling your life in the desired direction. It’s the repetitive choice of positive habits that generates the momentum required for positive life shifts.
Acknowledging the impact of small changes practiced consistently was a transformative revelation. This realization has led me to integrate several habits into my daily routine, each making a substantial difference in my life.
Meditation: The practice of meditation, often suggested by many, proved its worth in my life. Amidst my overactive mind’s relentless chatter, I sought refuge from endless worries and imagined threats. My remedy became daily meditation—a simple practice with profound outcomes. Seated comfortably, immersed in serene melodies, I focus on my breath. As my thoughts wander, I gently redirect my attention. Surprisingly, silence often unveils answers to questions I hadn’t even voiced.
Kind and Compassionate Self-Talk: My internal dialogue once mirrored a relentless bully, dousing my self-worth and confidence. I traced this unkind voice back to my upbringing, where challenging circumstances bred criticism. To counteract this, I learned self-compassion. When negative thoughts arise, I embrace patience, addressing myself as I would a dear friend. Recognizing the vulnerable child within those harsh words, I offer compassion rather than condemnation. It’s a process of acknowledging past pain while fostering self-love.
Following the Five-Second Rule: Mel Robbins’ “five-second rule” stands out as a game-changer. By counting five-four-three-two-one, you propel yourself into action, bypassing your mind’s resistance. This rule can be applied to situations like getting out of bed earlier to align with your goals. The initial pull to remain in bed is natural, but responding to the countdown initiates progress. Adopting this rule empowers me to step beyond hesitation and into accomplishment.
Feeding Your Mind: My commitment to continuous learning propels me forward. One annual retreat, monthly books, weekly podcasts, and daily articles satiate my hunger for knowledge. Limiting negative media exposure has become a priority, preserving my mental space. Reprioritizing my budget reflects my commitment to growth, reallocating funds from unnecessary expenses. By nourishing my mind, I’ve unlocked new avenues of opportunity and personal growth.
Venturing Beyond Comfort Zones: Embracing discomfort is the gateway to an expansive life. I’ve adopted a weekly practice of venturing beyond my comfort zone, pushing boundaries regularly. This habit has propelled me to make daring decisions like quitting a long-standing job without a safety net. Embracing uncertainty, I shifted my career path and geographical location, ultimately flourishing in a life reshaped by calculated risks.
In embracing these transformative habits, I’ve come to embody John Maxwell’s wisdom: “If your habits don’t line up with your dream, then you need to either change your habits or change your dream.” Through small yet consistent adjustments, I’ve moved mountains and cultivated lasting change. Encouraging you to follow suit, I extend an invitation to be brave, to allow discomfort to guide you toward an expanded, fulfilling life. The path to a better life lies in your daily choices, in the power of habits that shape your reality.